I... [ funny. but dazai understand him better than he does. the single spoken word is punctuated by an inhale, though it isn't shock he's expressing. rather, resignation, and the moment of comprehension that comes before it. the doors on both of their cages are slowly swinging open under their own weight, and neither one of them is paying attention. his mind wanders, again, to the idea that this was all as set up.
he didn't trust echo in the first place, but his tacit acceptance is curdling. it's beginning to taste more like resentment.
as his thoughts organize themselves, there are several questions resting on the tip of his tongue. he wants to ask dazai if he really thinks it's worth it. to try to live as a human. to try to live apart from his brothers, separated from his own home forever. could he? would it be worth it, even if he could? he's admitted his feelings for dean, but he doesn't know how else to express those but by putting himself to some use. what happens when he has nothing left to give?
could he forgive himself?
it feels like he's running out of time. did dazai feel that way too, with odasaku? when sakunosuke oda gave up his dreams, did dazai know the shape of the end?
by the time he speaks, his throat is dry. he wonders if dazai understands that, too. ]
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he didn't trust echo in the first place, but his tacit acceptance is curdling. it's beginning to taste more like resentment.
as his thoughts organize themselves, there are several questions resting on the tip of his tongue. he wants to ask dazai if he really thinks it's worth it. to try to live as a human. to try to live apart from his brothers, separated from his own home forever. could he? would it be worth it, even if he could? he's admitted his feelings for dean, but he doesn't know how else to express those but by putting himself to some use. what happens when he has nothing left to give?
could he forgive himself?
it feels like he's running out of time. did dazai feel that way too, with odasaku? when sakunosuke oda gave up his dreams, did dazai know the shape of the end?
by the time he speaks, his throat is dry. he wonders if dazai understands that, too. ]
We should go.