[ John understands the question for what it is. Harold is aware of why he needed the break, he's just asking what changed; what made him change his mind, get his act together again. They didn't really talk about this when he came back from Italy, Harold just accepted that he was back, and that was that. But this time Harold is asking, and it's not just small talk.
John sounds unsure when he talks, the topic foreign to him. Instead of looking at Harold he busies himself with turning up the stove, bringing the melted butter back up to temperature, starting to scramble the eggs. ]
I talked with some people and realized nothing was going to change the way I was going.
[ I wasn't going to get you back, he doesn't say. That's part of it, yes, even a large part of it, but not the whole truth. Maria was exactly right when she said he needed time to think. He still hasn't ordered his thoughts much, he still feels a mess every time he thinks that he's dead, but— there's some progress. Even if he's awkward and unsure and terrified and can't look directly at Harold in this moment, he's still here, he's making an attempt. He's trying to move forward, inch by inch. ]
no subject
John sounds unsure when he talks, the topic foreign to him. Instead of looking at Harold he busies himself with turning up the stove, bringing the melted butter back up to temperature, starting to scramble the eggs. ]
I talked with some people and realized nothing was going to change the way I was going.
[ I wasn't going to get you back, he doesn't say. That's part of it, yes, even a large part of it, but not the whole truth. Maria was exactly right when she said he needed time to think. He still hasn't ordered his thoughts much, he still feels a mess every time he thinks that he's dead, but— there's some progress. Even if he's awkward and unsure and terrified and can't look directly at Harold in this moment, he's still here, he's making an attempt. He's trying to move forward, inch by inch. ]