[ Harold tries to imagine how he'd feel if he weren't sure if Grace were alive or dead, if he'd ever see her again, and it's a vicious sharp kind of pain he can't dwell on long. Sometimes seeing her alive and safe was the only comfort he had, a beacon that reminded him he'd done one thing right in leaving her. Abandonment is a sin except for when it saves someone's life.
Maybe this isn't the right way to go about talking someone down from a panic attack with psychotic features, but Carver had just agreed with his assessment that he'd needed a job, he'd asked him for orders, and Harold's experience with others like him is that he must be oblique. He doesn't mind addressing emotions directly, but it makes them squirrelish. He has to come in from the side in order to have what he says land with any impact, because they'll reflexively dodge an emotional conversation like they would a blow.
So he runs through the commands with him for as long as it takes, looking both for Carver to memorize them but more so to gauge his mental state. He watches carefully, leads him through ontspannen, bewaker, af liggen, as many as he can think of. ]
... Do you have all that? [ he asks finally, his eyes still tight with worry.
Harold has his share of flaws and he's made a tremendous amount of mistakes, but he doesn't flinch from facing the consequences of what he's done. ]
no subject
Maybe this isn't the right way to go about talking someone down from a panic attack with psychotic features, but Carver had just agreed with his assessment that he'd needed a job, he'd asked him for orders, and Harold's experience with others like him is that he must be oblique. He doesn't mind addressing emotions directly, but it makes them squirrelish. He has to come in from the side in order to have what he says land with any impact, because they'll reflexively dodge an emotional conversation like they would a blow.
So he runs through the commands with him for as long as it takes, looking both for Carver to memorize them but more so to gauge his mental state. He watches carefully, leads him through ontspannen, bewaker, af liggen, as many as he can think of. ]
... Do you have all that? [ he asks finally, his eyes still tight with worry.
Harold has his share of flaws and he's made a tremendous amount of mistakes, but he doesn't flinch from facing the consequences of what he's done. ]