etrayalogs | MISSION 005 (part 1)

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MISSION 005 (part 1)

WHO: Everyone!
WHEN: September 13th-September 27th
WHERE: Throughout Etraya
WHAT: Mission Log!
NOTES\WARNINGS: Horror elements, including fear-inducing landscapes, distorted environments, unseen predators, mental/emotional distress, potential body horror, corruption, possession, brainwashing, and compulsion.

⏵ reality bends ⏴
A strange anomaly has overtaken Etraya. The skies, once familiar, now shift unpredictably, cycling through hues of unnatural colors as an eerie hum fills the air. Tension crackles beneath the surface, leaving an unsettling heaviness across the land. Aurora’s mission announcement offers little clarity—more cryptic than comforting—and she remains unavailable for further explanation.

Reality begins to warp, twisting Etraya into a surreal, haunting reflection of its former self.

The hospital deteriorates into a decaying structure, its halls haunted by phantom patients, endless corridors leading to nowhere. Rooms morph into massive white padded cells where characters may find themselves imprisoned, alone with spectral figures who whisper of treatments yet to come. Some of these apparitions seek the attention of those roaming the hospital, warning them of a dire fate: failure in this mission means not just the death of their worlds, but their souls becoming trapped in this fractured reality, far from home, forever.

The forest transforms into a dark and twisted labyrinth. The trees close in, their branches twisting unnaturally as unseen predators howl from the shadows. Narrow pathways wind through the maze, and while some may navigate unscathed, others will be violently pulled into the depths by horrors lurking just out of sight. Within this twisted forest, a small cottage appears, its walls echoing eerie whispers: "little scorpion," "selfish bitch," and "by the pricking of my thumbs, something wicked this way comes."

The rivers, usually calm, have become a dangerous, volatile force. Their waters churn violently, and inky black tendrils rise from the depths, lashing out at anyone who strays too close. These dark appendages drag their victims beneath the surface, where those who resist must battle their way to freedom. But those who surrender will be drawn into an otherworldly dome beneath the water, surrounded by strange fish, far from where they should be. Inside, they will find an eerie stillness, but their earpieces still allow contact with the world above. A large mirror dominates the dome, offering an uncertain way back.

⏵ shadowy haunts ⏴
Those inside the zones come face to face with an echo of fear - a personalized manifestation of what scares them most. It could be an oppressive figure from their past, or something more abstract, such as the feeling of failure, or isolation. These echoes are relentless, feeding off their weaknesses and digging into what makes them most vulnerable.

The Im'mari hungers, and preying on characters' weaknesses appears to be its chosen way of feeding itself. While characters may become stuck in their nightmares by themselves, some of these nightmares are shared between companions. Characters may become trapped within their friends' fears, or strangers'. However, the emotional distress felt by the individual the nightmare belongs to will affect everyone within the nightmare. An emotional prison built to torment those whom it belongs to, these echoes of fears may test the bond between companions, forcing them to face truths they may have rather avoided touching on. Earpieces will still be functional and may prove to be crucial in assisting characters when it comes to escaping their nightmares.

⏵ contamination ⏴
Im'mari may be weaker than before, but it is slowly regaining power, and the creature’s influence is spreading. It infects the wolves, the plants, and even the very essence of Vanessa Ives (and in addition, Aelwyn Abernant), feeding off the deep-seated fears of those around it.

Im'mari thrives in the shadows of fear and darkness, growing stronger with every moment of doubt, pain, and despair. Its presence lingers beyond the edges of awareness, whispering to its victims, urging them to succumb. Through Vanessa and those she has infected, Im'mari extends its reach, turning once-familiar faces into agents of fear, pushing their companions to the brink.

For those who fall under its sway, the transformation is slow, at first nearly undetectable. Perhaps a friend acts off, says something out of character, or expresses sudden, unprovoked anger. But as Im'mari’s power grows, so does the darkness in its agents, until they are no longer themselves—twisted into something monstrous, compelled to spread fear and destruction.

Welcome to your nightmares. We hope you have a pleasant stay.

⏵ NOTES ⏴

For all questions relating to this mission, please refer to the plotting post. We will be utilizing this post throughout the mission - including when we process the next round of applications, so please keep an eye out for new comments! All other questions can be directed to the FAQ.

⏵FULL NAVIGATION⏴

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

[ Fabian doesn't even realize what's going on here at first. He - indeed - doesn't even realize who he's trapped with here in this strange cell. The scenario is familiar enough that it drags up memories of a few years ago that he doesn't really want to think about, but the unfamiliarity of this specific kind of cell coupled with the strange way the other looks helps drag him out of that before he has any time to sink into memories he does not want to remember in this moment.

.. it doesn't help any part of the confusion though. He touched the plexiglass for a moment, like Fabian is hoping it might give away somehow, but before he can move to push against it harder or start anything else, the other figure in here speaks.

It makes Fabian turn towards him, regarding the figure with one silver eye.

He swallows, trying to make sure that by the time he speaks up, his voice sounds as confident as he'd like it to sound in this moment, rather than as panicked as he actually feels. ]

What's going on here?

[ Given all the worse case scenarios of who he could end up stuck here with, there had to be a few people who managed to be, more or less by default, better than some alternatives.

That's what Krouse thinks, seeing Fabian step into the cell through a door that doesn't quite exist, like a portal carved between universes. This could be worse. It could be somebody else. Fabian - he's better than it could have been, will be, has been. ]

Well, we're in prison.

[ He shrugs, a smile behind his mask crinkling the corners of his dark eyes. ]

Don't worry. I'm one of those quiet cellmates. A real keep to my own fucking business type. Not that you couldn't kick my ass, right, man?

[ His small, bitter - and possibly familiar - laugh bounces off the walls, intercut with the low, incessantly consistent beeping. He starts to raise his hands from his lap, then pauses, glancing back up at Fabian with his chin tucked in preparation to reach for the back of his head. ]

I don't think you deserve to be here, before you start trying to figure out if you actually did something wrong. It's just - let's call it an administrative fuck up, shall we?

[ With that, he finishes reaching up, and starts to undo the concealed fastenings of his mask. He takes enough time to give Fabian a second to process. ]

[ At first he doesn't recognize the voice. Sometimes that sort of thing is hard when you don't have anything else to go off, after all - no familiar surroundings, no familiar face. He's just staring at that mask and hearing the voice, and it doesn't register.

.. until it does. It's the laugh, actually. For some reason it's the laugh that slowly makes things click together in Fabian's mind, though the thought of it baffles him so much that he doesn't speak up about it right away. It gives Krouse more time to speak as the half-elf just stares at him with wide eyes, like he's trying to think of what this realization even means about any of this. About the mask, about the place they have found themselves in.

He doesn't know. He can't figure it out. And maybe it's not as important as just getting the hell out of here - wherever here is. Surely nowhere good.

So while Krouse is busy undoing the mask, Fabian steps over towards the other. He wants to grab onto the other's arm, but the fact that they're behind Krouse's head makes that hard, so he instead grabs the other by his collar, tugging him a little closer. (Sorry, bro.) ]

Krouse, what the fuck is going on?

[ BRO. Bro, he's so confused! Fabian doesn't even look angry, despite the way he's holding the other, he just looks-- confused, yes, and maybe also a little desperate to get them out of here. A fact that Krouse isn't really helping with all the vague talk right now. ]

There's no time for-- I don't know, prison roleplay, we have to get the hell out of here! [ IT'S TIME TO GO, DUDE!! IT'S GO TIME!! ]

[ Krouse jerks his head up out of his mask, his fingers in the eye holes, and of all the expressions he could have on his face, the one he personally is most surprised to find is a tiny, crooked half-smile, the corners of his eyes crinkled up in something like disbelief. ]

Man, I have no fucking idea what's going on.

[ It's not exactly something he blurts. It's more like something that falls out of him, jostled loose by Fabian's tug on his collar.

He doesn't admit he doesn't fucking know things, as a rule of thumb. But this place is digging it out of him. The people in this place are digging it out of him, this historical truth that's defined so much of the horrorshow his life turned into. He doesn't fucking know. ]

It's not roleplay. This is prison. We're not just walking out. And we've tried pretty much every fucking thing you're going to think of, so just - fuck, man.

[ His smile sticks in place, but the look in his eyes goes sharply stung, his expression all the more bittersweet for it. ]

You're not going to be stuck here. You're not supposed to be here. It'll spit you out, eventually. So relax. Take a breath. I'll explain, all right?

I'm not going to relax!

[ It's said practically right after Krouse finishes talking near the end there, like Fabian didn't have to stop and think about that statement for even a moment. It also comes with the sort of quick hand gesture that definitely indicates that-- yes, he's not going to relax. Fabian seems entirely incapable of relaxing in this very moment. He is absolutely stuck in some sort of high-strung mode that he can't stop until they escape this place.

Especially when Krouse keeps saying you, and just-- that's unacceptable. ]

I will relax after I drag the two of us out of whatever the hell this is, alright?! [ He gestures with his hand at the plexiglass, as if it's going to suddenly fade away under the sheer force of Fabian Intensity going on here.

But even though everything about Fabian's body still seems incredibly tense - which is likely the reason he doesn't move to sit down next to Krouse in the first place, instead remaining standing, bouncing on his feet with restless energy - he does huff to add: ]

But if you think some explanation is important [ read: will help them get out of here, because that is what Fabian is focused on right now, so much so that he can't even work up curiosity about Krouse's mask or why he would belong in there because that doesn't matter nearly as much as his friend's fucking safety-- ] then I guess I can listen.

Edited 2024-10-04 20:45 (UTC)

[ Krouse tosses his mask aside on his cot next to his top hat, then reconsiders. He shoves both objects further to the side and shuffles over, making a space on the cot next to him. Which he shouldn't do, because he's all but promised he's done with Fabian, and Riz, and Gorgug, and Adaine, and anyone else they care about.

But Fabian doesn't have anyone else to talk him down right now, if that's even possible. Probably not. Most people don't take well to being locked in prison. He remembers his first week in his windowless, solitary containment cell after he got arrested. He made Fabian look positively composed.

That's a joke for himself. It's not funny. ]

Okay. Don't relax. But sit down. You're making me tense.

[ Whether or not Fabian sits down, Krouse is going to talk. It's the only tool he has to work with. ]

Mimics. [ He says, after a second. ] You know mimics, right? There were some in the labyrinth. Things that look like one thing, but they're not that. They're projecting an illusion, or they're shapeshifted. Or fata morgana. Illusions of castles, or dungeons, or ships.

I think this is something like that.

[ I again, not the unspecified we of we've tried pretty much every fucking thing. No disrespect to his forced partner in crime, surprisingly enough. He just doesn't want to attach her to an explanation she'll give him shit for. ]

It's not real. It's a puzzle. A test. And I know it's not real, because I've been here before. Or a version of this place.

So it's fine. I'm not in more danger than any of us usually are.

[ That's a lie, but it comes so easy and so smooth that he barely even registers he's lying. What happens to him doesn't matter. ]

I know it seems less than ideal, but you have to keep in mind - I got out of prison once. I can do it again, right?

[ His smile has stayed level the entire time. It holds for this lie, too. He didn't get out of prison except at the hands of outside forces, ones he had no control over. But he just needs to keep looking cocky, the way he almost always can pull off looking like he knows exactly what he's doing when he doesn't have a fucking clue.

And maybe he wants Fabian to trust him, still, for a minute. It's selfish. Even as he's telling himself it's for Fabian's own good here, he knows it's selfish. But he's been in this place for a while now, and things haven't been going so hot.

It'd be nice to see someone look at him like he's not a complete fuck up one more time. ]

[ Well, at least one thing is happening here.

Fabian does sit down. He doesn't look happy about it - in fact, there's some real 'kid being dragged to the dentist by their parents' energy going on here - but he does move to sit down next to the other, rather than continuing to anxiously pace around the cell right in front of Krouse. Not that it really seems to calm him down. Fabian indeed seems incapable of relaxing even as he's sitting, and he's definitely having the leg jitters. Hope you don't easily get annoyed by watching someone's leg go up and down like that while they sit, Krouse.

And he even tries to shut up for long enough for the other to actually make that attempt at an explanation, rather than screeching through it. It's taking a lot out of Fabian right now, but he's trying so hard to be good! ]

Yeah. [ He finally says, not looking at Krouse or the smile on the other's face. ] I don't think you're wrong. This is some sort of test.

[ Because this place is fucked up. It's always so fucked up. Why wouldn't they throw the two of them in some cell? And judging by the way the cell looks - so unfamiliar compared to the one Fabian spent such a long time in - and the weird mask and top hat, this is a test meant for Krouse. Fabian is just there, because-- what, did this place think it'd make it harder for Krouse if someone else was present? Fabian wouldn't put it past this place. ]

But you know what the worst part about it is?

[ It's only as he says this that Fabian turns to look at his friend.

He's not grinning like Krouse. His facial expression is so much more serious than that, his tone matching his face. ]

The way you keep saying I'm not supposed to be here, when you aren't supposed to be here either. [ If it looks Krouse is about to say anything at all to that, Fabian is already holding up a hand, continuing with: ] Look, I don't care if you did something that got you in here back home, alright? I don't know what the whole-- the whole mask and tophat thing is about, and it doesn't matter. Because the only fucking thing here that matters is that you're my friend, and there's no way in hell that I'm going to be okay with the idea of my friend sitting in a jail cell.

[ The fidgeting does get on Krouse's nerves, but that's not Fabian's fault. The repetitive, grating beep of a low battery alarm that never fucking stops is what's killing him, tone by tone. Fabian's bouncing knee is only as aggravating as the sound of Krouse's own heartbeat when he can't stop listening to it, or the way his fingers keep itching to reach for cigarettes he doesn't have on him.

He's getting to the point where if someone asked him if he'd kill for a smoke, he'd have to say no, in case it was legitimately on the table. He doesn't want to deal with turning down the temptation.

After Fabian finishes talking, he's less sure he'd turn it down.

When Fabian called him a friend on the network, it was easy enough for Krouse to talk himself into shrugging off. It didn't have weight to it. It was just one of those things that Fabian says, easy and cheerful, his goodwill expanding to everyone and everything not immediately kicking him in the ribs at any given moment.

This has weight. This hits like that kick in the ribs, as if Fabian twisted to snap that bouncing knee gracefully and cleanly into Krouse's side. He's never seen Fabian this intent on anything, and it's like that laughing, good-natured charm has always been a sheath over the edged determination in his eye. Not a mask, or fake, but what Fabian holds this in when he doesn't want to cut anything.

Krouse doesn't know what to say. He's sitting there, like a fucking idiot, and he doesn't know what to say.

A low battery alarm beeps. He takes a breath he doesn't let shudder, gropes for his slipping grin, and drags it back into place. ]

Oh, you should probably care.

[ Fabian's dad is in hell, a notorious pirate captain. It stands to reason that Fabian has a loose respect for the law. But there's swashbuckling glory, and there's what Krouse did, as much as his whole goddamn persona was about turning violence into a performance. ]

I didn't just steal a car, Fabian. I mean, I did. Plenty of cars. Jewels, cash, scientific research, blackmail material, you name it. [ The things that are almost fun, almost forgivable. ] Then there was the arson. More of an accessory to that, typically. Assault, aggravated assault, conspiracy, kidnapping, unlawful imprisonment -

[ Now he's talking too much, rattling off a highlight reel, grin fixed in place tighter with each word. ]

- murder. That's a big one.

[ The first time he thought he'd killed someone, he hadn't felt it. It hadn't seemed real. It was the second time he killed someone that the first time caught up to him. And then, after a while, things stopped catching up to him again. They were just there. Things that happened. Compress and move on.

He thinks he knows how those deep sea fish feel, getting dragged to the surface. How guts expand and ripple out, skin gets blotched and sagging, all the pressured construct of survival swelling out into an ugly fucking mess of a joke.

We're not friends, is what he's supposed to say next. We are not fucking friends, you fucking braindead jock. ]

I'm the fucking bad guy.

[ And Fabian is a hero, lowercase h. Fabian is the guy who shows up to get the princess out of the tower, and fights off the dragon menacing the town, and stands up to the dark lord in his underground lair. Krouse has done everything the other way around.

We're not friends, he's still not saying. We're not. ]

[ Out of all possible reactions Krouse might have expected here, the one he gets was likely not among that list in the first place.

Because Fabian stares at him while he lists off all of those crimes, finally ending with that statement at the end, and all Fabian can say is-- ]

So what?

[ The words flow out of his mouth so simply. There's not even a beat between Krouse's last words and Fabian's first word, like it's sheer instinct he's speaking with over here. ]

I've done at least half those things, man! [ Murdering a man and stealing his bike happened on one of his very first days at school too.. Which was the first time he was actually properly socialized among normal people instead of getting dragged along with his father's crew all over the place.. ] If you take the rest of my party into account, then I am fairly sure we can cross off the entire list!

[ It helps that some people of their party - cough, Riz, cough - are a little more intense than Fabian, but still. He doesn't seem fazed whatsoever at the idea that Krouse did that stuff. And sure, it does make sense that'd land you into jail eventually, because cops suck and they don't understand, but-- ]

That doesn't mean you belong here. [ The very idea seems to agitate Fabian somehow. Especially the fact that Krouse seems fine with it. ] I mean, what single bad thing have you done to me ever since we got to know each other?

[ He pauses. It's not really to give Krouse space to answer as much as it's for dramatic effect, but it means there's a moment of silence, only the beeping in the background still continuing. ]

If you're a bad guy, then you're a really fucking terrible one, dude. [ Ironically that's kind of an insult, given what Krouse believes about himself and the structure of his world and all, like he's bad at doing the one thing he's supposed to be doing..

.. but it's not how Fabian means it. To him it's just proof of the fact that Krouse isn't a bad person, despite what he might have done. It's not like Fabian is a bad person for the things he did.

It's just called doing what you have to do. ]

I don't think they're even supposed to make friends.

[ Krouse stares at Fabian for a second like he's never seen him before in his life.

Then he laughs. It's a funny, raspy laugh, mostly held at the back of his mouth, disbelief and something so raw that Krouse makes himself stop laughing almost as soon as he starts. The set of his smile has shifted with it, though, a crooked hang of his lips as he draws his brows together. ]

I lied about playing soccer.

[ Of all the shit Krouse could have said next, that's up there with the most asinine possibilities. Who gives a fuck? It's not even the worst deception he wove into their first conversation.

But it feels like it matters, for some goddamn reason. That the first thing that ever seemed to really make Fabian excited about hanging out was bullshit. ]

The last time I played it I was in fucking middle school. I didn't do sports. I fucking - I learned about football so I could talk to a girl.

[ He is a fucking terrible bad guy. Some villainous monologue this is. Krouse rubs his face and shoves his hands into his hair, leaning over his knees, frustrated embarrassment welling up to blend with the misery of everything else. ]

I lied about it because I wanted to see if I could use you, man. I wasn't trying to be your friend. I wasn't trying to be friends with any of you. Gorgug - [ a faint hitch, more guilt than frustration ] - Gorgug fucking got it. Why don't you get it?

[ Talk about words that suddenly make a whole lot of different thoughts arise in Fabian's mind. Because sure, there's that remark about Gorgug that seems-- odd, why would Gorgug get this when he seemed just as cool with Krouse as Fabian had been? Does Krouse mean that Gorgug instantly accepted these words, that he just made that sad face Fabian sometimes sees him make, or..

It's not the only thought that comes to mind. It's almost too much to think about. Because there's the matter of if I could use you, relationships tied to worth, something very familiar to Fabian back when he was growing up. And wasn't one of the times he was reminded of that fact--

Look at you, look at you here, in this prison!

--right in a prison cell? And it wasn't this one, Fabian knows it. This belongs to Krouse, but even though it's Krouse's fear and feelings and past on display, there's some similarities that threaten--

I told you what you needed to do!

--to dig into Fabian as well, if he'll let them. Krouse is telling him that he was never trying to be friends with him, that he lied to Fabian because Fabian was the one who seemed eager for that instead. The sensation jolts him up from where Krouse asked him to sit, standing up once more with a sudden energy, like an emotional jolt. And isn't that the exact thing he was told last time he was in this position, last time he was in jail, that he--

You didn't need to be friends. You didn't need to be nancing around with your peers.

--but his father had been wrong with those words. Fabian realized it back then, but only faintly compared to the way he realizes it right now. Friends aren't a weakness. The world isn't about keeping people at a distance, just to make sure they won't betray you. Bonds are what make you strong, not weak. Even his father realized as much, right before he died. A little too late, perhaps.

His father had been wrong. And the more he sees Krouse sitting there, speaking those words but clearly seeming to struggle with them, Fabian realizes that Krouse is wrong as well. And Krouse doesn't even seem to realize it.

There's something simmering in Fabian's voice as he speaks, but it doesn't seem to be the reaction Krouse may expect. He doesn't seem heartbroken at the other's words. He doesn't look betrayed.

Instead there's some weird undertone. Something more intense, growing with every word. ]

You wanted to see if you could use me. And here I am, talking about freeing you, and rather than just using me like you said you were going to, you're trying to get me to turn away from this entire thing as soon as possible.

[ He suddenly reaches out, his hands grabbing onto Krouse's collar once more, but he doesn't do only that this time. Instead he puts more strength into it to hoist the other up, close to himself. It's not some crazy lift, since Fabian has muscle but not that much muscle, but he can definitely pull Krouse out of his sitting position, closer to Fabian's face.

After all, all that stuff wasn't the only thing his father had said in that prison cell. There had also been--

You're a captain. You are meant to lead, boy!

--the way they're similar, him and his father. The intensity that takes over Fabian right now very much like that other man, a determination in his eye that refuses to yield. ]

I don't care how it started out! [ He says - raising his voice. ] What I care about is now! So either start using me to get out of here, or just stop pussyfooting around your own feelings for five seconds, because this is not the damn place or time for it and I'm fucking going to get you out of here anyway, Krouse!

[ Fabian might have more of a challenge on his hands hauling Krouse up if Krouse's first instinct wasn't to go with it when Fabian grabs his collar and drags him up, one of two possible ways Krouse has ever reacted to a guy around his own age grabbing him, and Krouse's life has been so inflected by the past three years that he really only thinks of two different guys, two different sets of hands.

You don't deserve it, Luke said, a million fucking years ago, shaking his head as he held out a pack of cigarettes. I'll make it up to you, Krouse told him, and he never, ever fucking did. I'll get us out of here, and he didn't.

But God, did he fucking try. Spitting up blood and wiping his hand across the back of his mouth and dragging them from city to city, fisting his hand in Luke's collar just like this and telling him - whatever the fuck Krouse had to tell him, moment to moment, because everyone else was the team, and then there was her, but Luke was the only fucking friend he maybe ever really, truly had just because. For no real reason. Because he liked Krouse, even though Krouse was always an obnoxious, arrogant know-it-all, a habitual liar, as charming and trustworthy as a snake.

The worst thing about Luke wasn't that he turned on Krouse in the end. It's that it took Luke that long to finally give up on him. A thousand missed chances to bridge the gap, a thousand times Krouse could have done the right thing, said the right words, told the fucking truth. And he never, ever fucking did. ]

Fuck you!

[ The outburst snaps out of Krouse in a blurt of something even less defined than panic or outrage, a messy sizzle of nervous system static as Krouse glares, or stares, up at Fabian's face, his dark eyes narrowed intently and his mouth twisted in rippling emotion.

When he first was figuring out Fabian's team, he assumed Fabian was the leader. Then he thought it was Riz. Now Krouse is starting to think, distantly, that that's not how it works. None of them are the leader, like Riz was trying to tell him. They all step up when they think they have to. No one person to make the calls, take the blame, be the one who has to keep it all working as the wheels come off and the bus catches on fire.

And this part, right here. This is Fabian's job. Of course it is. He's a bard. Krouse could almost really fucking laugh. ]

Fuck - just, fuck you, man!

[ Krouse shoves Fabian's chest. It's a flat, open-palmed shove, the same kind of dumb roughhousing push that they got into on the concrete steps, and it's so stupid. Krouse knows how to hurt people now. Fabian could still absolutely kick his ass, but Krouse could throw a punch, at least.

He doesn't even know why he's pushing Fabian, because it's not hard enough to make him let go. ]

Maybe I just think you're useless, did you think of that? Maybe you're a fucking liability, asshole! Maybe you can't fucking get me out, huh? And what then, Fabian? What's the goddamn plan if the only thing you can do here is get dragged down by my shit? Are you still going to want to be my fucking friend [ he hisses it like a curse ] when I've fucked you over? Because oh, if you're going to believe one word out of my mouth - I will fuck you over. That's a fucking promise.

[ Fabian may have been willing to give credit to some of the things Krouse said before, or at least acknowledge they are an actual possibility, especially when he's far from being able to claim that he knows everything about Krouse.

This, though? Fabian is willing to bet a lot of gold that Krouse doesn't think he's useless or a liability. Granted - recent confidence boosts have helped with that belief existing within him right now. Gorgug sitting next to him in the hospital in Moorecroft, gently reassuring him. Riz telling him that he's not a problem, but a person with problems, and-- you know what? He's right. There's so much Fabian can do. If Krouse really was planning on only using him, he wouldn't be rejecting his one source of help in the middle of this situation. Because Fabian is useful.

It may not mean he knows what the hell else could be going on with Krouse for him to be acting this way all the same, but-- ]

Oh yeah?

[ Despite the shove not being strong enough for it, Fabian does release his hold on Krouse when those hands push against his chest..

.. but it's just so he can give Krouse a shove right back. It seems very similar in nature. Fabian clearly isn't putting all of his strength into it either, like he's returning the same energy Krouse is giving him here. ]

Is that a challenge? Because it sure sounds like one to me.

[ Another shove. ]

Go ahead, Krouse. Do it. Fuck me over! Fuck me over as hard as you possibly can if you want to do it so badly. I dare you.

Edited 2024-10-26 21:04 (UTC)

[ Krouse's jaw tightens when Fabian shoves him back, tightens more when he does it again, even as Krouse gives ground a half-step at a time.

This is so fucking stupid. They might as well be dogs raising their hackles through a fence, that's how fucking stupid it is. Macho posturing bullshit.

Krouse shoves Fabian back, harder, stepping into it. Stupid, posturing bullshit, and it feels good to have something to put some muscle into, as lean and lacking as his muscle is in comparison with Fabian. He's not some scrawny kid anymore. When he pushes back, it's not just pathetic. ]

Don't fucking try me.

[ He hisses, even though that's playing right into whatever the hell this is, despite having just promised that he'd fuck Fabian over as soon as he got the chance. He could whip up a dozen rationalizations for why this doesn't count as a chance, but in the moment, he doesn't even bother. ]

You dare me? What are you, twelve?

[ Krouse steps back then, throwing his gloved hands out at his sides, his eyes dark and focused and only a little wildly desperate for - something. He doesn't even know what he wants. For Fabian to throw a punch, to get angry, to be done with him. ]

Maybe I already have fucked you over. You're here, aren't you? I could be lying about you being able to leave. Or maybe I'll take your door. Leave you here. I mean, you want to help me, right? That's what you're saying?

[ If there's ever any proof that Krouse doesn't mean a word he's saying here - or at least not as plainly as the words would imply - it's this very fact here. Krouse is laying out the things he could be doing here to screw over Fabian, yet he hasn't done any of them. Instead he's just standing here with Fabian, talking about all of this when he could just be doing them.

And it's not that Krouse is simply too stupid to have done them already. That's not what the other is like.

Krouse doesn't want to fuck him over here. And it makes none of what he's saying really make sense, but--

Maybe he's just scared. Whatever the hell is going on in town right now, it seems to be preying on people's fears, and maybe this jail is a terrible memory for Krouse. Maybe that's what's getting him all on edge, acting like an idiot about it.

It's the sort of thing he could put the other in a bro-style headlock over to show him it is alright, that this situation might remind Krouse of something awful but they're going to get out of here together. But-- Fabian remembers being scared. He remembers being terrified for his very life in a way that was so different from any battle he's ever been in. He remembers facing his own worst fears in the forest, and suddenly spotting Gorgug, and just running to him for a hug, and it did feel better.

...

He's been staring at Krouse, suddenly silent for a moment, but then Fabian just reaches out to wrap both of his arms around the other guy, pulling him into a hug before Krouse would even have the chance to try and push him away. ]

If you think that I wouldn't voluntarily stay behind if it was necessary to get you out of here, then you're an idiot, man.

[ Krouse tenses when Fabian tugs him closer, like he's expecting something terrible. He tenses, but he doesn't shove Fabian away, and if that doesn't say something fucked up about him, Krouse doesn't know what does.

And if Fabian hugging him doesn't say something fucked up about him, too, Krouse doesn't know what does either. Fucked up in the sense that no one should be this forgiving, not if they want to keep themselves from getting stabbed in the back.

Krouse could literally stab Fabian in the back right now, if he was one of those capes who kept a knife up his sleeve. Fabian doesn't know that he isn't. Krouse tells himself that, even though part of him knows, deep down, that Fabian does know it. Krouse slipped up. He didn't hit hard enough to make a point. ]

Don't -

[ He chokes out, his arms stiff at his sides as his face is pressed into Fabian's shoulder. That's what he tells himself is happening, anyway, as his nose buries into Fabian's shirt. His eyes squeeze shut as he hisses like a radiator, his shoulders hitching into sharper tension. ]

Then you're an idiot. [ He says, muffled and wretched. ] Like I'd fucking let you be that fucking noble.

[ He digs his face deeper into Fabian's shoulder, or maybe he's pushed there. Maybe there's no real difference that matters. His heart struggles and throbs, and then, with another hitch of his shoulders, gives up. He slumps against Fabian, exhausted and pathetic, and lets himself actually breathe. ]

[ This isn't necessarily the sort of thing Fabian is used to. It sure isn't the way either of his parents bothered to comfort him when he was younger, just not having that sort of love language, nor a full understanding of what did or didn't upset their son in the first place.

But in this moment.. Something about it feels right. The more Krouse leans into him, almost like he's trying to bury himself against Fabian, the more right the entire decision to hug the other guy in the first place feels, despite everything being said between the two of them only a few moments ago.

He holds Krouse even a little tighter for it, one hand sliding up the other's back until it's resting between his shoulderblades. ]

Sorry, man.

[ Fabian doesn't actually sound sorry at all. Instead there's something excessively warm about his tone, even though he sounds a little amused at the same time. Strangely enough it doesn't sound like he's making fun of Krouse though - maybe Fabian is just revelling in the face that Krouse bothered to give in at all, rather than making this even more awkward between the two of them.

When - maybe - all they wanted to share instead was just this. Even if it was hard to admit to themselves. ]

It's mandatory when you befriend me. After I had the worst fucking day of my life, I decided I wasn't going to let any friend deal with shit this bad all by themselves. So you're stuck now.

[ Krouse wants to snap back with something crisp and cleanly sarcastic, some quip that will crack the corner of this sincerity somehow, except he doesn't really want to do that. He just knows he should want to do that, or would have wanted to do that, or doesn't know what else he even can do.

What he wants to do is hang in Fabian's stupid jock hug like a scarecrow lugged off the pole. It's like his body doesn't even know how to react to getting held like this, like he's some desiccated dead plant soaking up water and unfurling from its dry crunch to spongy, still mostly dead dampness.

Speaking of dampness, he bites his tongue, refusing to leak. ]

Must have really been the worst fucking day.

[ For Fabian to be so committed to this 'friendship' thing, for Fabian to be so committed to sticking with people, for Fabian to be so endlessly the way he is. Krouse still doesn't wrap his arms back around him, but he lets most of his weight rest on Fabian, and maybe that's enough for right now. ]

You're not [ he says, his voice crinkling at the edges with embarrassment to even be asking ] you're not going to tell anyone about this, right?

[ Fabian lets out a huff when Krouse says that first thing. Because-- yeah, it sure was. Fabian doesn't want to get into it out loud when there's so much baggage attached to that day, but it really was.

Maybe it's what makes it so easy to not judge Krouse in this moment. To not give Krouse as hard of a time as he seems to be giving himself over here. Fabian knows what it's like to reach rock bottom, and though he desperately longed for someone to reach out to him when he was there, he's not sure he would have known what to do with it if anyone had. Just like Krouse right now. ]

About what part, dude? [ There's something lightly teasing in his voice, but it's the mildest version of 'bro giving another bro shit.' It sounds more fond than anything else, unfortunately for Krouse. ] Us hugging? Our friendship? The fact you got thrown into super jail over being that big of a criminal?

[ He squeezes Krouse at that last part, but also loosens his grip just a little after that, so Krouse can escape the hug once it's too much for him. ]

I don't know, that last one might actually make you sound very cool.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

MISSION 005 (part 1)

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this is like a literal novel LOL I'M SO SORRY... me experiencing so many feelings about two boys

I LOVE HIM

I LOVE THEM.... this is truly the most Teen thing ever now

what is wrong with them (a lot) (teenagers)

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