WHO: Boba Fett, Connor, and Peter Parker WHEN: During Mission 004 WHERE: Assigned housing WHAT: Closed starters for "family" interactions NOTES\WARNINGS: Probable mentions of teen parenthood, familial death, and general familial dysfunction
It’s the thought that has been running through Fett’s head ever since he stepped out of the portal less than an hour ago. If this is indeed another bubble city like Etraya, then it stands to reason that Echo is running this one, too—and that means they’re just as liable to subject its denizens to the same sort of games and experiments. Perhaps this particular settlement has a different coat of paint, so to speak, a facade of placid mundanity, but beneath the surface, Fett expects it to be just as chaotic as Etraya.
As a result, he’s ill-at-ease as he approaches the blue-paneled house at the address that’s been provided to him, along with two names he doesn’t recognize labeled “spouse” and “dependent.” Or perhaps it’s the note itself that has him uneasy. It speaks of a level of control that Aurora hadn’t attempted to implement in Etraya, and the fact that this AI—Eos, as he’s heard—expects to tell Fett whom his family is rankles him.
’Mirta. Sintas. Beviin. Medrit.’ Ever since Fett was brought to Etraya, those names run through his head whenever he’s staring down the barrel of a particularly unpleasant task. He can stomach a lot of indignity for the sake of those four people—even if it means pretending to go along with an AI demanding they all play house.
And speaking of house… there’s something waiting for him on the porch of this one. A basket sits off to the side of the front door, contents as-of-yet undisturbed—Fett must be the first one to arrive. A folded piece of paper obscures what seems to be a bundle of white fabric and as he approaches, the words written atop it become visible:
”Hello! Give me a name and raise me, please!”
There seems to be more written below this puzzling message and so Fett reaches down and plucks the note from the basket—only to reveal a tiny face hiding beneath. Fett freezes, all thoughts momentarily grinding to a halt as he processes the shape in the basket before him.
That’s a baby. They’ve left a baby in front of his assigned housing.
It’s then that the words on the note finally catch up to him, with all the impact of concussion rocket to the chest. This is no mistake; this baby had him delivered to this house for a reason. Namely: someone expects him to raise the damn thing.
The baby, for its part, seems to have been roused from slumber by the removal of the note over its face. It opens its eyes, blinking in a hazy confusion that Fett finds far too relatable right now—and begins to fuss.
Fett doesn’t know what possesses him to pick up the baby—maybe just some instinctive aversion to the possibility of it starting to cry—but before he knows it, he’s scooped it up as if on autopilot, one hand moving unthinkingly to cradle its head and neck while the other lifts it to his chest. The baby, fortunately swaddled against the touch of cold beskar plates, begins to settle down.
He briefly registers surprise that he still remembers how to do this—and then that line of thought gets decisively shut down before it can lead anywhere dangerous. He stands up, baby still in tow, and looks around. He might not have been looking forward to meeting his new “family” before, but now, they can’t come soon enough. There has to be someone among them better suited to taking care of this baby than him. ]
THE BABY IS HERE, BOYS... 3 men and a baby is real
[That sound of panic is the first introduction that the household will have to Peter Parker — or is it Peter Fett? Is Fett a last name? Does Connor even have one? He just doesn't know. The important part is that he is panicking and a little hyper-realistic baby is screaming her head off and looking way real (in a creepy not-real way he can't put his finger on, but-)]
What should I do? I've never had to do anything for a baby before...!
[He picks the baby up from the crib, anxiety in the gesture, with his hands under her arms and her legs dangling. She is not remotely pleased by this, and frankly Peter isn't either, because he realizes that this room? Is also his assigned room; he is well and truly a teenaged dad, as his mission perimeters have determined.]
Please stop crying. Please stop crying? Please be happy. How do I make you happy?
[ Since Fett had put the baby down in the crib, he's been hoping for a bit of a reprieve.
She'd been asleep when he'd put her down, which meant he'd had the opportunity to walk away and pretend like this wasn't happening while he explored the rest of the house. Mostly, he'd been trying to forget how it had felt—how easy it had been for his hands to assume that position, how familiar it had felt. How it had felt the same way when—
No, no, he is not thinking about that right now. He is walking around this house, memorizing the layout, and searching for surveillance devices. He is not thinking about the baby, which isn't even real and will probably end up being some sort of trap just like the stuffed dolls had been, anyway. Obviously, he shouldn't be thinking about it at all unless as another component in this game or test that Eos has set up for them here.
...Of course, it would be easier not to think about it if, just as Fett has finished that thought, the baby didn't start crying. And not just the baby, either. Fett hears another voice rise in distress along with hers, adding to the cacophony. That will be another of his new housemates, then. A housemate who had apparently woken the stars-damned baby.
Jaw set, Fett follows the sound back up the stairs into the room with the crib, where he finds a young man holding the baby—or, more specifically, a young man who is holding the baby in the entirely wrong way. ]
What are you doing?
[ The words come out more like an accusation than a question. And for good reason, Fett thinks. The boy holds the baby like a kid with a baby doll—no wonder the thing is squalling. ]
Put it down, [ Fett orders brusquely, jerking his head towards the crib. ] Before you break it.
[Connor is almost entirely too alert to the goings on inside of this new house. just as Fett investigates the house, he does, too (in his own way). Peter is a complete stranger to him, and he and Fett hadn't started on the right foot. now they've all been plucked from whatever familiarity they knew and forced into a family setting. Connor knows what a family is, knows strictly from information and set programming, how a baby should be comforted, but is completely out of his realm of truly understanding what family is, or how he should feel to be in a fake one.
Peter's (and the baby's) cries jolt him from his inspection of the living room and have him hurrying to the source of the noise.
what is happening. the situation does not seem dire, but everyone is acting like it is? why is the baby crying like that? activating mediation programming--]
I don't believe he'll break it, but perhaps you should hold it closer?
[it's an AI baby. maybe he can deactivate part of it, which is exactly what he tries to do by stepping closer to Peter and touching the baby's temple, attempting to interface with it. his skin pools away to reveal white plastic, but-
nothing happens. the baby is still crying. his hand falls to his side, he looks defeated.]
I don't understand. Normally, that would have calmed her down. I wasn't designed for childcare, but I do have the information that would permit me to attempt it. Do you mind?
[holding his hands out, he waits for Peter to hand the baby over. hopefully.]
[Peter is a deer in the headlights when Fett wanders into the room. If someone could ooze stress? Peter would be the blob from those old movies.]
But it — she started crying in the crib already. What am I supposed to do with her if she's already crying?! [He is soooo already bombing this objective, and all while the beginnings of a headache swirl around in his skull like clouds in a storm. He can't even focus on how cool his apparent adoptive father looks, with his armor and cool looking space-helmet, and with Connor's arrival, his attention is split three-ways now.]
Uh! Um! Yes. Yeah, okay. [He tries to hold it closer — her closer. Treating the potentially sentient baby doll kindly is actually a smart choice, especially because Peter will feel like total garbage if she's got full awareness and feelings. He fumbles around to try and hold the baby appropriately, so he can maybe pass it off to Connor instead.]
[ Whatever Connor was attempting to do with his hand-to-the-temple trick apparently doesn't work. The baby is still crying, and Fett's helmet controls have long-since decided that the volume is at unacceptable levels and buffered the sound. It only offers slight relief—something in the Human brain seems hard-wired to respond to the sound of babies crying, no matter how muffled it may be. Furthermore, Fett's not exactly encouraged to hear Connor's disclaimer that he wasn't designed for childcare. Fett recalls from their first meeting that the droid had claimed to be designed for law enforcement.
Still, Fett doesn't say anything yet. He knows how to hold a baby—he hates that he knows, but he does. It's just not something he wants to talk about, much less with two near-strangers he's being forced to live with for the foreseeable future.
So he lets himself fade into the background as Connor attempts to take charge, ready to intervene only if the droid does something truly stupid. His only input will be answering the boy—Peter's question. ]
[all questions that Connor knows the answer to, but has no physical experience with. his expression is sympathetic -- more directed toward Peter than the baby -- as he gingerly takes the baby from his hands and cradles it, almost as if it's second nature to him. however, the cries don't subside and he's left staring down at it as if he's looking at an alien; absolutely boggled. at least it's being held properly now?]
I feel obligated to admit I've never held a baby before. [he's doing what parents are supposed to do. he has warmth but no natural heartbeat and all synthetic breathing. briefly, he looks to Fett for a lifeline, as if he's asking for help, or what he could be doing wrong here. Fett is the only adult human in this house and Connor makes an assumption that he has experience here. a slow glance back to Peter, half distracted now that the noise is against his chest. his LED blinks yellow rapidly and returns to steady blue.] That's correct. I'm sorry, my name is Connor, I'm an android made by CyberLife. I don't believe we've met before.
[priorities override introductions. his focus is back on Fett.]
I don't mean to be rude, but it may be beneficial if you removed your helmet.
[for being the least human here, Connor is calculating whether or not the helmet is disrupting this -- baby's?? -- mental state. it had been crying before he entered, but really, he wants to rule everything out.
[Peter is awed by the company he's keeping at the moment. One guy in cool sci-fi battle armor, and the other being an actual android. It almost drowns out the baby's crying, even if it's gotten just a modicum less loud and frantic.]
Well, uh, Connor, maybe — maybe try, like, rocking? Rocking babies. I've seen that before, when they're mad. [He gestures with his own arms, charading the action. Will it actually help? He's not sure, but he doesn't like to be totally useless in any circumstance.
Any concern for his role in this weird family immediately is put on pause, though, when Connor turns to Fett. Peter is admittedly curious why the guy still has on his armor while he's just casually at home, but — well, he also knows what it's like to have your face hidden with reason. So he adds after Connor:]
[ It seems that the droid at least knows how to hold a baby. Given the way Connor proceeds to stare down at the still wailing infant afterwards, Fett isn’t sure how much else he knows about childcare, but it’s better than nothing. Peter's advice to try rocking the baby isn't terrible, either.
Still, Fett has little time to feel relieved that his assigned family isn't completely incompetent, given the request Connor makes next.
Underneath the cover of his helmet, Fett’s eyes narrow. So the droid thinks this is his fault? He hadn’t even been in the room when the baby had started squalling. It’s not like babies react to Mandalorian armor the same way adults do, anyway; once they learn to associate a face with food and care—even a face made of metal—they don’t pay much notice to anything else. Ailyn certainly hadn’t.
The thought makes Fett exhale quietly through his teeth. The last time he’d seen his daughter, she’d been a woman grown, a stranger in a body bag. When he thinks of her like that, it’s almost bearable. But that's the problem with this place; it seems intent on digging up the other memories he has of her. They are, after all, the only reason he knows how to do any of this.
Of course, Fett says nothing. He also doesn’t reach for his helmet. Instead, he simply turns on his heel and walks out of the room.
Let Connor and the boy flail over the baby themselves if they think he’s the problem. He’s not going to bother arguing otherwise.
In the meantime, he’ll head to the kitchen. After all, he’s loath to stand idle and leave himself to his thoughts—and it'll be easier not to think about the baby if it's not crying. Maybe he can at least see if the house is stocked with a baby bottle and formula… ]
[aaaand he's gone. it was worth a shot. the baby's consistent cries equals out to a singular noise in his ears, varying in intensity. truthfully, Connor didn't know if the removal of the helmet would work or not. babies cry for so many reasons and this one seems to be crying for - nothing? do they feed it? do they pretend to feed it?
he takes Peter's advice to rock the baby as Fett appears to look in his general direction before he leaves. Connor is dissatisfied. he relies on the expressions of humans to know how to react or feel, yet Fett provides nothing. vitals are a little easier to pick up, but they're nothing compared to the intricacies of the human face. his body language gives him enough, at least. he leaves the two of them in the room to fend for themselves.
a brow is arched at Peter. the rocking isn't exactly helping, but it's also not not helping? the cries have somewhat changed? what kind of task is this!]
Being in a family unit with strangers is an added ... challenge, but not impossible. I haven't ever encountered something like this, though. [did they fail in parts of designing him, or was he truly not capable of fixing this? is the baby defective in some way?] The data I have on childcare does provide information about colic, but I'm not sure why this would be programmed to have it.
[... Connor, did you piss that guy off? Well, Peter is just gonna leave that drama between those two. He's too busy trying to troubleshoot the whining and/or crying of a fussy robo-baby. He wanders around the room, looking for anything — anything! — that could help with the baby's upsetness.]
Maybe that's just to be mean? Or maybe to make it as realistic as possible.
I just don't understand why this is one of our tests. Or is it even a test?
[Returning to the baby, he holds up a little stuffed pink elephant, wiggling it around in front of the angry child's face. In a little sing-song voice, he tries hopefully:]
Ooooh, look at that! Look at the cute little elephant. See? Brm-brmmmm!
[That's an elephant trumpet noise. Quietly performed.]
[ In the kitchen, Fett is faring somewhat better than his hapless housemates upstairs. He finds two already-prepared bottles of formula in the refrigerator—a small mercy—and, doing his best to let his mind go blank, brings one over to the sink. He has to take one of his gloves off for this next part and that alone leaves him feeling uncomfortably exposed.
Connor doesn't know what he's asking.
Fett runs the tap, using his now bare hand to check the water temperature. He's waiting for it to be hot enough to warm up the cold bottle of formula, trying hard, again, not to think about how he knows this trick.
It's while he's waiting by the tap, focusing about nothing, that he notices the console. It's affixed to the side of a cupboard, digital text laid out in several lists—and, Fett he, each list is headlined by each of the names of the house's current occupants: him, Connor, and Peter. That gets his attention. Naturally, Fett looks under his own name first. The top entry reads:
Calm a crying baby
'Working on it.' Fett thinks. His eyes move to the next few entries:
Read a book to someone
Give your spouse a kiss
Attend a neighborhood function
Give your neighbor a house-warming gift
Start a book club
Teach your child a skill
Keep your helmet off in the house
It's a list of tasks, Fett realizes. Not unlike the ones Aurora sometimes assigns them. Is this Eos's doing? Fett reads through his list again, incredulity slowly giving way to cold anger. They really are just karking with them at this point, aren't they? It's not enough to be forced to cohabitate with one another, now the AI expects to order them around their roles like dolls in a dollhouse.
Fett turns his head sharply away from the console. He's just... going to pretend he hadn't seen it, for now. He knows he'll have to reckon with it sooner or later, but at the very least, he's not going back in that room without his helmet.
...Calm a crying baby. He'll start there.
It'll be a few minutes before he has the bottle of formula sufficiently warmed up. At that point, he'll head back upstairs. He won't announce his presence just yet, instead waiting outside the door to see what progress—if any—his housemates have made with the baby. ]
[his expression falters, something between a blank stare and confusion, when Peter suggests that the baby might have been programmed to act this way just to be mean to whomever may hold it.]
Normally, features like that would be able to be deactivated. [a flurry of thoughts run through his mind. is it a test? are they being monitored with how they treat the AI infant? is this AI connected to a larger database?] If it's a test, I can think of what they could be testing, but I'm not sure why.
[the pink elephant comes out and Connor watches the interaction, barely taking a whole second to process it and follow suit. another round of cooing, he tries to engage with the baby more and encourage it to cheer up thanks to this
elephant noise??? Connor is doing his best. so is Peter. he is so absolutely engrossed in this activity that he only half-registers Fett's return. he picks up his heartbeat from a scan out of his peripheral, but keeps his focus on the baby.]
[And maybe for Connor, his Stress Levels? Probably. Definitely. Hang in there, buddy. Peter is so engrossed, too, that he's just as surprised to see Fett pop back in. If he's totally honest, he thought maybe the guy just totally flounced out of this situation (which is fair, because Peter would do the same if he wasn't a do-gooder with a hard head, honestly).]
You think she takes real baby formula?
[For the record? Not a lot of progress. But the crying has at least significantly dimmed from the downright feral outrage the baby's cries had been moments before.]
[ Fett doesn't say anything to the apology, mostly because right now he'd prefer not to think of the request that had necessitated it—and the fact that he's going to have to abide by it at some point if he wants to complete his assigned tasks. He also doesn't verbally respond to Peter's question because there's only one way to find out. ]
Give me the baby.
[ 'Calm a crying baby.' It's not the worst item on his list, so he may as well start there. Plus, after seeing their panic and confusion just figuring out how to hold the baby, Fett doesn't quite trust Peter or Connor to feed it without causing further agitation. ]
[Connor's LED flickers yellow at Fett's suggestion. it isn't a suggestion, really - more of an order. Peter is easy to read, all skin and wide eyes and macro-expressions that assist in understanding emotions.
All Connor can work off of Fett is tone of voice and vitals. it's not that he doesn't know how to hold a baby, it's that he's never held a baby. he thought he was doing well. are babies supposed to be handed off constantly to find a source of comfort? how is it supposed to form a connection? and why does he feel protective of it?
but he complies anyway, because it needs to stop. he's less clumsy in his handling than Peter, methodical in the way he hands it off to Fett and asking a personal question along with it:]
[Peter looks between the two of them, split between profound interest in Connor as a robot-guy and Fett as a crouching tiger, hidden dad (and to be honest, the dad thing is something he's less equipped in than robotics, so it's just as captivating).]
That'd be awesome if you do, because we both clearly have no clue how to deal with kids.
I mean, I've been an only kid, and I don't have any cousins or anything like that...
[May and Ben really had very, very few family members, and he's not even sure where his mom's side of the family even is. He thinks maybe he's got grandparents somewhere? Maybe another uncle or aunt? It's a big question mark.]
[ It doesn’t matter how much Fett has been reminding himself that the baby isn’t real; when Connor hands it over to him, he still feels his stomach drop. Still, his movements quickly conform to old instincts, cradling the baby securely while keeping any of her exposed skin from touching the cold plates of his armor. She’s still being fussy, but the exchange doesn’t provoke any renewed shrieking. So far, so good.
Fett’s so focused on the task at hand that it takes him a moment to process Connor’s question and Peter's babbling afterwards. Experience with children? Even without the benefit of seeing Fett's face, they might be able to read the reluctance into the lingering pause that follows, and the single terse syllable afterwards: ]
Some.
[ What is he supposed to say? Not children, just infants and 20-year-old estranged grandchildren who’ve tried to kill him? He doesn’t want to talk about it.
As if sensing the sudden discomfiture in her minder, the baby in his arms begins to squirm. Fett turns his attention back towards her, offering her the bottle of warmed formula. Mercifully, the nursing instinct wins out and she takes it, a few moments of quiet finally descending upon the house.
Fett doesn’t even bother with a sigh of relief. He looks up at Connor and then Peter. ]
There’s something in the kitchen you should see. [ There’s a grimness to his tone, like he’s sharing something he’d rather not. ] On the side of the cabinet next to the sink.
[some. Connor is inclined to ask, but Fett's short answers and dismissive tone is telling him to hold his tongue. not that that ever really stopped him. judging from Fett's natural ability to hold the baby, it's a little more than some. more than the two of them put together, anyway.
his eyes follow every one of Fett's movements. how he tends to the baby, how the baby is even programmed to take formula. he wonders where it goes, or if it dissolves.]
I'll go look, then. Maybe you can join us, since you've been able to calm her down.
[he gives Peter a sidelong glance and his movements are delicate, hardly any sound as he steps around him to make his way to the kitchen. normally, he'd call from the other room when finding a new piece of evidence information, but that could cause more of a fuss. now he's forced to wait. he whispers to himself, then finds the both of them sooner than waiting for them both to arrive, possibly in the hallway.]
One of the tasks is give your spouse a kiss. I don't see how that would be helpful in this situation.
[Peter is wondering much of the same, with regards to the baby: how the heck is it consuming formula? Where does it go? It's clearly real stuff and not those magic toy bottles that look like they're emptying. He doesn't have much more time to question anything because Connor's already on the move.]
Hey, wait for me...!
[Connor does not, in fact, wait for him. Instead, he nearly runs back into Connor in the hallway, where he Peter looks thoroughly confounded.]
Hold on — tasks? What tasks? It sounds more like Truth or Dare for you guys.
[ Fett follows more slowly, both because he's already seen the list and to avoid jostling the still-feeding baby. He joins the other two just in time to hear their little discussion.
(Did the droid have to bring up that one task in particular?) ]
They're not supposed to be helpful. They're making us act out our roles in this... family.
[ He does not sound pleased using that last word. ]
That's why they gave us the baby. We're meant to act like we're actual parents. Or spouses.
[ Fett thinks he'd find second trip into the Sarlacc less agonizing. Unfortunately, he didn't get to choose this mission. He'd like to have a few words with whoever did... ]
[sorry, Peter. Connor's able to process bits of information by just barely glancing at it, which is why they're nearly running into each other in the hall.]
Truth or dare is a game, and would imply that the participants are having fun. [no one has smiled since arriving.] I wouldn't define this as fun. The other tasks involve more social activities. [he glances pointedly at Fett - the task of removing the helmet remains unsaid. back to Peter:]
Then, you're supposed to fill the role of our child. I know what a family is, but I haven't experienced one as you two have.
[another glance at Fett, because he isn't sure if he's experienced family, either. he's only working off of tone of voice.]
I'm having a hard time understanding how Eos thinks forcing strangers together will encourage what people describe as a 'warm' environment.
And you don't even look old enough to have me as a son! What's even their process in deciding who goes where? Or what their goals are? [Looking at the list in question, he's immediately struck by even the concept of a crying baby in his vicinity.] I've barely been able to hold onto a girlfriend for more than a few months; I can't be a — a dad!
[ As much as Fett agrees with both assessments that the situation they've been placed in is both obnoxious and nonsensical, he sees little point in standing here rehashing that fact. Yes, this is terrible. No, standing here criticizing Eos isn't going to make it any less terrible. ]
Eos is playing the same game as Aurora, [ he says impatiently. ] You think she engineered the labyrinth or the cursed toys for our benefit, too? This is a test, just like everything else.
[ Which means, as much as Fett hates it, he isn't going to stand here and let them fail. He thinks back to his own list of tasks. There had been one about teaching his "child" a skill, hadn't there? His visor turns towards Peter. ]
Come here, [ he orders tersely. ] I'm going to teach you how to hold a baby.
It's ... a challenge that I can understand is uncomfortable for all parties involved. Keep in mind this is only for a limited amount of time.
[he isn't made for this. he doesn't think he's quite at uncomfortable-level territory, but he is definitely toeing the line. all attention back on Fett, he's not giving up when it comes to trying to get more information out of him. even if it means cheating.
aka, poke the bear.]
Fett is old enough to have had several children, even grandchildren. If there is supposed to be some benefit to our situation, I'd like to think that we can all learn from each other.
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etrayalogs2024-07-20 04:44 pm
moving in;
It’s the thought that has been running through Fett’s head ever since he stepped out of the portal less than an hour ago. If this is indeed another bubble city like Etraya, then it stands to reason that Echo is running this one, too—and that means they’re just as liable to subject its denizens to the same sort of games and experiments. Perhaps this particular settlement has a different coat of paint, so to speak, a facade of placid mundanity, but beneath the surface, Fett expects it to be just as chaotic as Etraya.
As a result, he’s ill-at-ease as he approaches the blue-paneled house at the address that’s been provided to him, along with two names he doesn’t recognize labeled “spouse” and “dependent.” Or perhaps it’s the note itself that has him uneasy. It speaks of a level of control that Aurora hadn’t attempted to implement in Etraya, and the fact that this AI—Eos, as he’s heard—expects to tell Fett whom his family is rankles him.
’Mirta. Sintas. Beviin. Medrit.’ Ever since Fett was brought to Etraya, those names run through his head whenever he’s staring down the barrel of a particularly unpleasant task. He can stomach a lot of indignity for the sake of those four people—even if it means pretending to go along with an AI demanding they all play house.
And speaking of house… there’s something waiting for him on the porch of this one. A basket sits off to the side of the front door, contents as-of-yet undisturbed—Fett must be the first one to arrive. A folded piece of paper obscures what seems to be a bundle of white fabric and as he approaches, the words written atop it become visible:
”Hello! Give me a name and raise me, please!”
There seems to be more written below this puzzling message and so Fett reaches down and plucks the note from the basket—only to reveal a tiny face hiding beneath. Fett freezes, all thoughts momentarily grinding to a halt as he processes the shape in the basket before him.
That’s a baby. They’ve left a baby in front of his assigned housing.
It’s then that the words on the note finally catch up to him, with all the impact of concussion rocket to the chest. This is no mistake; this baby had him delivered to this house for a reason. Namely: someone expects him to raise the damn thing.
The baby, for its part, seems to have been roused from slumber by the removal of the note over its face. It opens its eyes, blinking in a hazy confusion that Fett finds far too relatable right now—and begins to fuss.
Fett doesn’t know what possesses him to pick up the baby—maybe just some instinctive aversion to the possibility of it starting to cry—but before he knows it, he’s scooped it up as if on autopilot, one hand moving unthinkingly to cradle its head and neck while the other lifts it to his chest. The baby, fortunately swaddled against the touch of cold beskar plates, begins to settle down.
He briefly registers surprise that he still remembers how to do this—and then that line of thought gets decisively shut down before it can lead anywhere dangerous. He stands up, baby still in tow, and looks around. He might not have been looking forward to meeting his new “family” before, but now, they can’t come soon enough. There has to be someone among them better suited to taking care of this baby than him. ]
THE BABY IS HERE, BOYS... 3 men and a baby is real
[That sound of panic is the first introduction that the household will have to Peter Parker — or is it Peter Fett? Is Fett a last name? Does Connor even have one? He just doesn't know. The important part is that he is panicking and a little hyper-realistic baby is screaming her head off and looking way real (in a creepy not-real way he can't put his finger on, but-)]
What should I do? I've never had to do anything for a baby before...!
[He picks the baby up from the crib, anxiety in the gesture, with his hands under her arms and her legs dangling. She is not remotely pleased by this, and frankly Peter isn't either, because he realizes that this room? Is also his assigned room; he is well and truly a teenaged dad, as his mission perimeters have determined.]
Please stop crying. Please stop crying? Please be happy. How do I make you happy?
[Bottle? Diaper? Just angry? Help.]
no subject
She'd been asleep when he'd put her down, which meant he'd had the opportunity to walk away and pretend like this wasn't happening while he explored the rest of the house. Mostly, he'd been trying to forget how it had felt—how easy it had been for his hands to assume that position, how familiar it had felt. How it had felt the same way when—
No, no, he is not thinking about that right now. He is walking around this house, memorizing the layout, and searching for surveillance devices. He is not thinking about the baby, which isn't even real and will probably end up being some sort of trap just like the stuffed dolls had been, anyway. Obviously, he shouldn't be thinking about it at all unless as another component in this game or test that Eos has set up for them here.
...Of course, it would be easier not to think about it if, just as Fett has finished that thought, the baby didn't start crying. And not just the baby, either. Fett hears another voice rise in distress along with hers, adding to the cacophony. That will be another of his new housemates, then. A housemate who had apparently woken the stars-damned baby.
Jaw set, Fett follows the sound back up the stairs into the room with the crib, where he finds a young man holding the baby—or, more specifically, a young man who is holding the baby in the entirely wrong way. ]
What are you doing?
[ The words come out more like an accusation than a question. And for good reason, Fett thinks. The boy holds the baby like a kid with a baby doll—no wonder the thing is squalling. ]
Put it down, [ Fett orders brusquely, jerking his head towards the crib. ] Before you break it.
sound the alarm
Peter's (and the baby's) cries jolt him from his inspection of the living room and have him hurrying to the source of the noise.
what is happening. the situation does not seem dire, but everyone is acting like it is? why is the baby crying like that? activating mediation programming--]
I don't believe he'll break it, but perhaps you should hold it closer?
[it's an AI baby. maybe he can deactivate part of it, which is exactly what he tries to do by stepping closer to Peter and touching the baby's temple, attempting to interface with it. his skin pools away to reveal white plastic, but-
nothing happens. the baby is still crying. his hand falls to his side, he looks defeated.]
I don't understand. Normally, that would have calmed her down. I wasn't designed for childcare, but I do have the information that would permit me to attempt it. Do you mind?
[holding his hands out, he waits for Peter to hand the baby over. hopefully.]
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But it — she started crying in the crib already. What am I supposed to do with her if she's already crying?! [He is soooo already bombing this objective, and all while the beginnings of a headache swirl around in his skull like clouds in a storm. He can't even focus on how cool his apparent adoptive father looks, with his armor and cool looking space-helmet, and with Connor's arrival, his attention is split three-ways now.]
Uh! Um! Yes. Yeah, okay. [He tries to hold it closer — her closer. Treating the potentially sentient baby doll kindly is actually a smart choice, especially because Peter will feel like total garbage if she's got full awareness and feelings. He fumbles around to try and hold the baby appropriately, so he can maybe pass it off to Connor instead.]
Sorry, did you say designed? Are you an android?
[AND DO YOU KNOW HOW TO HOLD BABIES...
The baby is still screaming. Just FYI.]
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Still, Fett doesn't say anything yet. He knows how to hold a baby—he hates that he knows, but he does. It's just not something he wants to talk about, much less with two near-strangers he's being forced to live with for the foreseeable future.
So he lets himself fade into the background as Connor attempts to take charge, ready to intervene only if the droid does something truly stupid. His only input will be answering the boy—Peter's question. ]
Yes. He is.
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I feel obligated to admit I've never held a baby before. [he's doing what parents are supposed to do. he has warmth but no natural heartbeat and all synthetic breathing. briefly, he looks to Fett for a lifeline, as if he's asking for help, or what he could be doing wrong here. Fett is the only adult human in this house and Connor makes an assumption that he has experience here. a slow glance back to Peter, half distracted now that the noise is against his chest. his LED blinks yellow rapidly and returns to steady blue.] That's correct. I'm sorry, my name is Connor, I'm an android made by CyberLife. I don't believe we've met before.
[priorities override introductions. his focus is back on Fett.]
I don't mean to be rude, but it may be beneficial if you removed your helmet.
[for being the least human here, Connor is calculating whether or not the helmet is disrupting this -- baby's?? -- mental state. it had been crying before he entered, but really, he wants to rule everything out.
and also see who's under there.]
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Well, uh, Connor, maybe — maybe try, like, rocking? Rocking babies. I've seen that before, when they're mad. [He gestures with his own arms, charading the action. Will it actually help? He's not sure, but he doesn't like to be totally useless in any circumstance.
Any concern for his role in this weird family immediately is put on pause, though, when Connor turns to Fett. Peter is admittedly curious why the guy still has on his armor while he's just casually at home, but — well, he also knows what it's like to have your face hidden with reason. So he adds after Connor:]
If you want to, anyway. No pressure.
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Still, Fett has little time to feel relieved that his assigned family isn't completely incompetent, given the request Connor makes next.
Underneath the cover of his helmet, Fett’s eyes narrow. So the droid thinks this is his fault? He hadn’t even been in the room when the baby had started squalling. It’s not like babies react to Mandalorian armor the same way adults do, anyway; once they learn to associate a face with food and care—even a face made of metal—they don’t pay much notice to anything else. Ailyn certainly hadn’t.
The thought makes Fett exhale quietly through his teeth. The last time he’d seen his daughter, she’d been a woman grown, a stranger in a body bag. When he thinks of her like that, it’s almost bearable. But that's the problem with this place; it seems intent on digging up the other memories he has of her. They are, after all, the only reason he knows how to do any of this.
Of course, Fett says nothing. He also doesn’t reach for his helmet. Instead, he simply turns on his heel and walks out of the room.
Let Connor and the boy flail over the baby themselves if they think he’s the problem. He’s not going to bother arguing otherwise.
In the meantime, he’ll head to the kitchen. After all, he’s loath to stand idle and leave himself to his thoughts—and it'll be easier not to think about the baby if it's not crying. Maybe he can at least see if the house is stocked with a baby bottle and formula… ]
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[aaaand he's gone. it was worth a shot. the baby's consistent cries equals out to a singular noise in his ears, varying in intensity. truthfully, Connor didn't know if the removal of the helmet would work or not. babies cry for so many reasons and this one seems to be crying for - nothing? do they feed it? do they pretend to feed it?
he takes Peter's advice to rock the baby as Fett appears to look in his general direction before he leaves. Connor is dissatisfied. he relies on the expressions of humans to know how to react or feel, yet Fett provides nothing. vitals are a little easier to pick up, but they're nothing compared to the intricacies of the human face. his body language gives him enough, at least. he leaves the two of them in the room to fend for themselves.
a brow is arched at Peter. the rocking isn't exactly helping, but it's also not not helping? the cries have somewhat changed? what kind of task is this!]
Being in a family unit with strangers is an added ... challenge, but not impossible. I haven't ever encountered something like this, though. [did they fail in parts of designing him, or was he truly not capable of fixing this? is the baby defective in some way?] The data I have on childcare does provide information about colic, but I'm not sure why this would be programmed to have it.
[aside from making people upset.]
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Maybe that's just to be mean? Or maybe to make it as realistic as possible.
I just don't understand why this is one of our tests. Or is it even a test?
[Returning to the baby, he holds up a little stuffed pink elephant, wiggling it around in front of the angry child's face. In a little sing-song voice, he tries hopefully:]
Ooooh, look at that! Look at the cute little elephant. See? Brm-brmmmm!
[That's an elephant trumpet noise. Quietly performed.]
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Connor doesn't know what he's asking.
Fett runs the tap, using his now bare hand to check the water temperature. He's waiting for it to be hot enough to warm up the cold bottle of formula, trying hard, again, not to think about how he knows this trick.
It's while he's waiting by the tap, focusing about nothing, that he notices the console. It's affixed to the side of a cupboard, digital text laid out in several lists—and, Fett he, each list is headlined by each of the names of the house's current occupants: him, Connor, and Peter. That gets his attention. Naturally, Fett looks under his own name first. The top entry reads:
'Working on it.' Fett thinks. His eyes move to the next few entries:
It's a list of tasks, Fett realizes. Not unlike the ones Aurora sometimes assigns them. Is this Eos's doing? Fett reads through his list again, incredulity slowly giving way to cold anger. They really are just karking with them at this point, aren't they? It's not enough to be forced to cohabitate with one another, now the AI expects to order them around their roles like dolls in a dollhouse.
Fett turns his head sharply away from the console. He's just... going to pretend he hadn't seen it, for now. He knows he'll have to reckon with it sooner or later, but at the very least, he's not going back in that room without his helmet.
...Calm a crying baby. He'll start there.
It'll be a few minutes before he has the bottle of formula sufficiently warmed up. At that point, he'll head back upstairs. He won't announce his presence just yet, instead waiting outside the door to see what progress—if any—his housemates have made with the baby. ]
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Normally, features like that would be able to be deactivated. [a flurry of thoughts run through his mind. is it a test? are they being monitored with how they treat the AI infant? is this AI connected to a larger database?] If it's a test, I can think of what they could be testing, but I'm not sure why.
[the pink elephant comes out and Connor watches the interaction, barely taking a whole second to process it and follow suit. another round of cooing, he tries to engage with the baby more and encourage it to cheer up thanks to this
elephant noise??? Connor is doing his best. so is Peter. he is so absolutely engrossed in this activity that he only half-registers Fett's return. he picks up his heartbeat from a scan out of his peripheral, but keeps his focus on the baby.]
Welcome back. I'm sorry if I offended you.
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[And maybe for Connor, his Stress Levels? Probably. Definitely. Hang in there, buddy. Peter is so engrossed, too, that he's just as surprised to see Fett pop back in. If he's totally honest, he thought maybe the guy just totally flounced out of this situation (which is fair, because Peter would do the same if he wasn't a do-gooder with a hard head, honestly).]
You think she takes real baby formula?
[For the record? Not a lot of progress. But the crying has at least significantly dimmed from the downright feral outrage the baby's cries had been moments before.]
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Give me the baby.
[ 'Calm a crying baby.' It's not the worst item on his list, so he may as well start there. Plus, after seeing their panic and confusion just figuring out how to hold the baby, Fett doesn't quite trust Peter or Connor to feed it without causing further agitation. ]
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Something about that doesn't sit right with me.
[Connor's LED flickers yellow at Fett's suggestion. it isn't a suggestion, really - more of an order. Peter is easy to read, all skin and wide eyes and macro-expressions that assist in understanding emotions.
All Connor can work off of Fett is tone of voice and vitals. it's not that he doesn't know how to hold a baby, it's that he's never held a baby. he thought he was doing well. are babies supposed to be handed off constantly to find a source of comfort? how is it supposed to form a connection? and why does he feel protective of it?
but he complies anyway, because it needs to stop. he's less clumsy in his handling than Peter, methodical in the way he hands it off to Fett and asking a personal question along with it:]
Do you have experience with children?
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That'd be awesome if you do, because we both clearly have no clue how to deal with kids.
I mean, I've been an only kid, and I don't have any cousins or anything like that...
[May and Ben really had very, very few family members, and he's not even sure where his mom's side of the family even is. He thinks maybe he's got grandparents somewhere? Maybe another uncle or aunt? It's a big question mark.]
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Fett’s so focused on the task at hand that it takes him a moment to process Connor’s question and Peter's babbling afterwards. Experience with children? Even without the benefit of seeing Fett's face, they might be able to read the reluctance into the lingering pause that follows, and the single terse syllable afterwards: ]
Some.
[ What is he supposed to say? Not children, just infants and 20-year-old estranged grandchildren who’ve tried to kill him? He doesn’t want to talk about it.
As if sensing the sudden discomfiture in her minder, the baby in his arms begins to squirm. Fett turns his attention back towards her, offering her the bottle of warmed formula. Mercifully, the nursing instinct wins out and she takes it, a few moments of quiet finally descending upon the house.
Fett doesn’t even bother with a sigh of relief. He looks up at Connor and then Peter. ]
There’s something in the kitchen you should see. [ There’s a grimness to his tone, like he’s sharing something he’d rather not. ] On the side of the cabinet next to the sink.
i did not get this notif omg
his eyes follow every one of Fett's movements. how he tends to the baby, how the baby is even programmed to take formula. he wonders where it goes, or if it dissolves.]
I'll go look, then. Maybe you can join us, since you've been able to calm her down.
[he gives Peter a sidelong glance and his movements are delicate, hardly any sound as he steps around him to make his way to the kitchen. normally, he'd call from the other room when finding a new piece of
evidenceinformation, but that could cause more of a fuss. now he's forced to wait. he whispers to himself, then finds the both of them sooner than waiting for them both to arrive, possibly in the hallway.]One of the tasks is give your spouse a kiss. I don't see how that would be helpful in this situation.
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Hey, wait for me...!
[Connor does not, in fact, wait for him. Instead, he nearly runs back into Connor in the hallway, where he Peter looks thoroughly confounded.]
Hold on — tasks? What tasks? It sounds more like Truth or Dare for you guys.
[KISSING???]
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(Did the droid have to bring up that one task in particular?) ]
They're not supposed to be helpful. They're making us act out our roles in this... family.
[ He does not sound pleased using that last word. ]
That's why they gave us the baby. We're meant to act like we're actual parents. Or spouses.
[ Fett thinks he'd find second trip into the Sarlacc less agonizing. Unfortunately, he didn't get to choose this mission. He'd like to have a few words with whoever did... ]
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Truth or dare is a game, and would imply that the participants are having fun. [no one has smiled since arriving.] I wouldn't define this as fun. The other tasks involve more social activities. [he glances pointedly at Fett - the task of removing the helmet remains unsaid. back to Peter:]
Then, you're supposed to fill the role of our child. I know what a family is, but I haven't experienced one as you two have.
[another glance at Fett, because he isn't sure if he's experienced family, either. he's only working off of tone of voice.]
I'm having a hard time understanding how Eos thinks forcing strangers together will encourage what people describe as a 'warm' environment.
[this is not warm.]
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[He holds his arms out, looking puzzled.]
And you don't even look old enough to have me as a son! What's even their process in deciding who goes where? Or what their goals are? [Looking at the list in question, he's immediately struck by even the concept of a crying baby in his vicinity.] I've barely been able to hold onto a girlfriend for more than a few months; I can't be a — a dad!
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Eos is playing the same game as Aurora, [ he says impatiently. ] You think she engineered the labyrinth or the cursed toys for our benefit, too? This is a test, just like everything else.
[ Which means, as much as Fett hates it, he isn't going to stand here and let them fail. He thinks back to his own list of tasks. There had been one about teaching his "child" a skill, hadn't there? His visor turns towards Peter. ]
Come here, [ he orders tersely. ] I'm going to teach you how to hold a baby.
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[he isn't made for this. he doesn't think he's quite at uncomfortable-level territory, but he is definitely toeing the line. all attention back on Fett, he's not giving up when it comes to trying to get more information out of him. even if it means cheating.
aka, poke the bear.]
Fett is old enough to have had several children, even grandchildren. If there is supposed to be some benefit to our situation, I'd like to think that we can all learn from each other.